How are you?
Fine.
How’s work?
Fine.
How are things at home?
Fine.
Fine sounds neutral. Harmless, even. But most of the time it’s not a description - it’s a shortcut. A way of compressing everything you’re actually feeling into something socially acceptable. A way of moving quickly instead of pausing long enough to ask: what am I actually feeling right now?
And here’s the danger. When you’re unhappy, you know something is wrong. Unhappiness demands action. Fine doesn’t. Fine is comfortable enough to stay in.
The most dangerous place to be in life isn’t unhappy. It’s fine.
This was me. I spent thirty years building and scaling companies in financial services, technology and digital transformation. My last startup won Richard Branson’s Startup of the Year. From the outside, I looked successful. Behind the scenes I was overwhelmed, burning out, and tolerating far more than I realised. And the dangerous part - I was still performing well enough that nobody noticed. Including me.
That’s the thing about drift and high-functioning people. It hides behind competence.
The tolerance trap is what happens when something isn’t bad enough to force you to change - but isn’t good enough to allow you to thrive. You notice something doesn’t feel right. You learn to live with it. You rearrange yourself around it. You tell yourself it could be worse. And eventually, what you’re tolerating starts to feel normal.
Nothing collapses dramatically. It just erodes. Because every day you tolerate something, you’re voting for it - again and again.
You’d never run a business this way. In business you measure everything - revenue, performance, pipeline. You audit your business every quarter and never audit your life. Your life deserves the same discipline.
So I recorded this session to walk you through it. In under twenty minutes you’ll do a full Tolerance Audit across five areas - mind, body, relationships, purpose and daily life - find your ripple tolerance (the one that shifts the others when it shifts), and decide what it needs: remove, repair, redesign or release. Then you’ll set one next right action - small enough to do in 24 hours, specific, and yours.
You’ll need a notebook. Pause where I tell you to pause.
And if you do the audit and want help with what you find - book a free call with me. We’ll look at your page together, find your ripple tolerance, and map out what remove, repair, redesign or release actually looks like for you.
It’s not a pitch. It’s a conversation.
Book your free call → balanse.ai/call
Loral xo
